And I Wonder...

I’d probably say something like this:

• Woke up
• Hit snooze on my alarm
• Went back to bed
• Woke up to go to the bathroom
• Went back to bed
• Woke up when my alarm went off for the 8th time, probably
• Noticed I had a missed call and a voicemail
• Listened to said voicemail to find out it was the principal from a high school that I interviewed with last week saying he wanted to fill me in about the position
• Freaked out
• Spent the next hour and a half freaking out and figuring out how I would respond if he either a) offered me the position or b) told me he hired someone else
• Fixed breakfast whilst still freaking out
• Mailed some letters for my dad (still freaking out)
• Wrote down a list of pros and cons about working at said school if I were in fact to get hired
• Called my dad to ask his opinion
• Called my mom to ask her opinion (b/c I can’t make decisions by myself, apparently)
• Called principal
• He was busy and the secretary told me she’d have him call me back when he was finished
• Decided to get my mind off it and at least stop hyperventilating
• Watched 18 to Life online (b/c it’s Canadian and I can’t watch it on real TV)
• Principal called.  Told me they had offered the position to someone else with more experience with musicals.
• Was kind of relieved, yet kind of discouraged
• Decided for whatever reason to pretend I was singing karaoke at a bar and what song would I sing if I were ever to find myself in said situation?
• Sang Lady Gaga’s “Born This Way”
• Sang Lady Gaga’s “Judas”
• Sang Lady Gaga’s “Bad Romance”
• Sang La Roux’s “Bulletproof”
• Sang Cascada’s “Evacuate the Dancefloor”
• Sang Katy Perry’s “Waking Up in Vegas”
• Sang Lady Gaga’s “Poker Face”
• Sang Lady Gaga’s “Just Dance”
• Sang Rihanna’s “Rude Boy”
• Sang Backstreet Boys’s “Backstreet’s Back”
• Sang Backstreet Boys’s “Larger Than Life”
• Sang Backstreet Boys’s “The Call”
• Sang Backstreet Boys’s “Quit Playin’ Games With My Heart”
• Sang Britney Spears’s “Circus”
• Sang Britney Spears’s “If You Seek Amy”
• Decided to switch up styles and sang “Per la gloria”
• Went to the piano to see if it was in the right key.
• It wasn’t.
• Sang it in correct, higher, key
• Decided to play piano for an hour or so or maybe more; I lose track of time when it’s rainy and crappy outside and I’m still in my pajamas
• Thought very strongly about going to the rec center to run
• Remembered that I need to print out my résumé and letters of recommendation for tomorrow and Wednesday’s interviews
• Remembered that we have very low black ink
• Remembered that my mom left me a twenty dollar bill on the table with a post-it on it that said to buy ink, along with a teacher discount coupon to Office Max
• Got a soda (Vanilla Coke!)
• Went to Office Max to buy ink, declined the two suggestions I got to buy computer paper that was “on sale, 2 for $10, that’s a really good deal”
• Impulsively drove to McDonald’s and ordered a double cheeseburger w/o onions and small fries
• Realized if I don’t start running soon I’m going to gain at least 5 lbs and not be able to run…at all
• Stuffed my face with my McDonald’s whilst watching Days of Our Lives with my mom and sister
• Got back on my computer b/c that’s where I live
• Decided to do something semi-mature and check school districts for more openings
• Found at least one and applied, even though the position is “TBD,” which I think is code for “not a real opening, you’ve been PUNK’D, jackass!” or maybe “hey click this link and waste at least 10 minutes of your life that you’ll never get back but at least it seems like you’re doing something worthwhile”
• Looked around at a few different school districts’ websites and teachers’ blogs
• Downloaded the Bach B Minor Mass which is pretty awesome and you should TOTALLY CHECK IT OUT ON THIS CONVENIENT LINK THAT WILL DIRECT YOU TO YOUTUBE WHERE YOU CAN HEAR ONE OF MY FAVORITE MOVEMENTS IN THE WHOLE DAMN THING…IT’S REALLY SPECTACULAR…SERIOUSLY…YOU’RE MISSING OUT IF YOU DON’T LISTEN TO IT PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE JUST CHECK IT OUT…GIVE IT AT LEAST 15 SECONDS OF YOUR TIME YOU WON’T BE DISAPPOINTED I PROMISE!!!
• ^^^ Seriously not kidding.  Check it out.  If not, we’re no longer friends.  I had the immense pleasure of performing the mass in its entirety last spring at Mizzou and it was one of the coolest pieces I think I’ve ever performed.
• So I downloaded the entire mass and am currently listening to it b/c the whole thing is a little under an hour and 45 min.
• I got the mail
• Got a letter saying that my current credit card is about to expire and that I was sent a replacement last year but that their records indicate I’m still using the old one (expires in June) and to start using the new one.
• Tried to remember where I put that after my mom sent it to me about a year ago in the mail and then where it went when I was moving out of my college apartment
• Spent about half an hour looking for it but still couldn’t find it
• Decided to call to request a new one be sent b/c I’m an idiot and lose important things like that (actually I really don’t, I know it’s somewhere in my room, I just don’t know if it’s really worth it to look for it)
• Made a cup of coffee
• Sat down in comfy recliner
• Decided to write a tumblr post, aaaand
• we’ve come full circle

That’s what I would tell them.